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a joke

A friend of mine, a theology student working on her Ph.D posted this on facebook. Thought y'all might enjoy it. Happy New Year!

Once there was a very old and respected Native elder. She had always lived on the rez, and saw a lot of folk come and go. Now, one group that cycled through the rez pretty frequently were the missionaries. There was always a new bunch rushing in to save Native souls.

 

Because this elder was very respected in the community and very committed to the traditional beliefs and practices, missionaries sought her out to be their conversionary coup d'etat. But always she refused.

 

Well, one day a new missionary arrived in town, and before long he made his way to this elder. The missionary asked her if she knew what would happen to her when she died. The elder said yes. The missionary asked her if she believed in Jesus Christ. The elder said she figured Jesus was a good spiritual leader with a good message. The missionary didn't like this response and told her if she didn't become born again and do away with all her pagan ways, she would burn forever in the lake of fire. The missionary asked the elder if she was prepared for THAT. The elder said she didn't think there was a lake of fire in the spirit world. The missionary continued telling the elder all about hell and the devil, and all the misery that awaited her should she not become a Christian.

 

Well, the missionary kept pressing her to come to church and become born again, but the elder always said no.

 

And then, the elder fell sick and soon passed away.

 

**********

 

When the elder awoke from her sickness, she realized she was now in the spirit world. The elder found herself walking along a beautiful mountain road. She saw every bird, plant, and animal she had ever seen or heard of from her elders, and felt much peace from their presence. She could hear the sound of rushing mountain rivers close by, and felt the cool mountain breeze blow through her hair. She continued along the road and wondered if there were any people around.

 

Well, no sooner did the thought pop into her mind than she turned a bend in the road, and saw a large sign along the side. It read "Welcome to Hell. Continue straight away." The elder found this sign curious, so she continued along the road. Soon she was overtaken by the aroma of beautiful spring flowers. And while she was enjoying their scent, she saw another sign saying "Hell 1 mile". Well, the elder continued along until she came to a trading post. In the trading post window, she saw a neon sign flashing "HELL" .

 

She went up to the trading post door, and saw a man seated inside. He had a nice smile and friendly face. She was about to introduce herself when the man said, "No need to introduce yourself, I know who you are. I've been waiting for you--Welcome to Hell!"

 

The elder asked, "Is this really Hell?"

 

The man replied, "It surely is."

 

She asked, "Who are you?"

 

He said, "I'm the devil."

 

She said, "So there really is a hell and devil then?"

 

He said, "Yes there surely is, and I wanted to personally greet you upon your arrival."

 

She said, "You know, you look a little different than I expected."

 

He blushed and said, "Well, I get a lot of bad press sometimes."

 

So he offered her a comfy chair and a glass of lemonade for her long journey, and they sat outside chatting for awhile. Then the devil asked if he could show her around, so the two went for a walk.

 

The devil showed her all sorts of beautiful places. The elder asked if any of her relatives who had passed before her were there. He said they surely were, and took her to meet them.

 

Sure enough, all her kinfolk were there, enjoying themselves and at peace. The elder was just overjoyed to be reunited with everyone and thanked the devil for all his help.

 

The devil blushed again and said he always tried to accommodate and make folk happy.

 

The elder noticed over yonder there appeared to be a large canyon and asked the devil about it. The devil said he would show it to her so away they went. They walked for awhile until they came to an outcrop of rocks, then sat down and rested awhile. Once they did, the elder peered into the canyon and saw huge sharp rocks amidst a great burning fire. The elder asked the devil what this was. The devil told her it was the Lake of Fire. The elder noticed a lot of people were in that lake---crying and screaming, and gnashing their teeth.

 

The elder asked the devil who those people were and why they were in there. The devil said, "Oh, those are the Christians. They prefer hell this way for some reason...."

Comments

( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
vivianstcloud
Dec. 31st, 2010 03:12 pm (UTC)
LOL. Aint that the truth.
jamesbaxter
Jan. 1st, 2011 07:32 pm (UTC)
I really love this!!!!
( 2 comments — Leave a comment )